How To Get Over & Survive A Gay Breakup?

April 17, 2021

Reading Time: 4 minutes

Loving someone and being loved back is one of the greatest feelings that makes you feel alive. It empowers you, nurtures you – but when a relationship ends, you don’t just lose your soul mate; it shatters the dream of being together forever.

In some cases, it may happen quite surprisingly – but in some instances, it may get sour, toxic, and painful. Dealing with a gay breakup can make you feel bewildered and alone.

So, if you are reading this, you must be going through such mental turmoil, and we understand the amount of pain you’re feeling.

This pain is excruciating, and it might make you feel that you are on an endless voyage to the dark hole, but there are ways to come to terms with a gay heartbreak and move on with your life.

First of all, you need to know that there aren’t any scientific formulas on how to survive a breakup for guys. Even after saying that, this blog intends to tell you how to deal with a gay relationship breakup – what to do and what not to do!

Accept the fact and feed yourself

Remember that the more you will try to avoid the facts, the worse your feeling will get. When a relationship ends, accept the fact that this feeling will stay with you for quite a while.

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So, what should you do? Get high and drink it out! – NO

You must surrender to the facts, but this is not the end of the world, and tomorrow is a new day – a new day to develop new thoughts – maybe a new relationship.

But, getting into another relationship too early may not work out quite appropriately. The best thing to do right now is to nourish and nurture yourself with healthy food and an active routine. Instead of staying alone after a gay break up, you can invite a friend of yours who will listen to you. Invite someone who will offer his/her shoulder to cry and later help with the dishes.

Remember that the previous relationship was just a part of your life and not your whole life. You have a great personality, and of course, you can utilize this minor bump to nurture yourself. A gay heartbreak was definitely not something you were looking forward to or been anticipating for a long time, but it can help you to reconnect with yourself – maybe with the part that was shackled into confinement.

When we’re in a relationship, we make certain compromises, like not going for the sci-fi movies because your partner hated them (but you love them). 

Or, maybe you stopped listening to Bob Dylan because your partner likes loud music, or you stopped experiencing the thrill rides at the amusement parks because it made your partner furious. Now, this is the time – a time to discover your old self again and do the things you love without and drawbacks.

Break the old routine and articulate new ones

Readjusting to a new life –a single life, after a long relationship is never easy – and it’s not supposed to be. Things would be more challenging if you used to indulge in regular activities that majorly include your ex-partner.

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But gone are those days when you needed someone to complete specific tasks. You are on your own now, so accept but also get out of your grieving cycle.

 A day without laughter is a day wasted – The great Charlie Chaplin used to believe in it, so can believe in it too. Life is too short to confine yourself into the tyranny of grief – and building a new routine will help you to get out of this monstrous hold after a gay relationship breaks up.

Remember that the idea is to create places and not go back and fill in the old empty spaces.

Take constructive decisions with a good close friend

As mentioned above, it is never a good idea to stay alone all the time (though you will feel like it) after a gay breakup. No matter how hard you try to project yourself as a mentally tough person, deep down you know that you need someone (who will offer their shoulder to cry)to share your feelings.

Sharing your feeling or crying in front of a real friend doesn’t make you a weaker individual. On the contrary, you are crying after your gay heartbreak because you are human and not a machine that is programmed to laugh and smile all the time.

Connect with your good friends (the closest ones) over dinner or lunch share what you have been going through. Don’t just text them or share your feeling via a bunch of emojis, but talk your heart out. A good friend will always try to help you to navigate through the painful past.

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Things NOT to do after a gay breakup

Now, there are certain things that you must try and avoid to survive gay breakups.

Knowing what not to do after a gay relationship heartbreak is equally essential–and in most cases, these not-to-do steps might distract you from getting back.

Don’t talk about your past relationship all the time

Let’s not confuse you here!

You must talk about your feelings with your good friends after a breakup – but not all the time.

You can talk to your friends, family, and even to the therapist – but over-talking will push you backward.

Remember that your good friends will always be with you, but don’t just rewind the same topic every day at every meeting.

Don’t hold on to the past forever

Of course, your ex-partner was a significant part of your life – may be the x-factor that you needed – but that won’t alter the fact that you’re single now.

As mentioned above, don’t just close the doors too soon, as it will have worse effects, but you need to acknowledge that such obsession is not a healthy choice.

Stalking your Ex-partner

At first, it may seem relatively harmless to stalk your partner on social media, but it will have ill effects.

There are high chances that you will see your ex-partner with someone else. Or maybe seeing him utterly alright with the breakup might push you into a mental breakdown.

There is a BLOCK feature available – so use it – from all the social media platforms.